April Unscripted: Hopeful romantic

April Unscripted – Issue #3 (February 2026)

Hello wonders,

I will, once again, say I hate writing about Valentine’s Day, love, and relationships. But here I am again. Oversharing with reckless optimism and questionable regard for my past, present, or future love life.

Alright, let’s get into it...

My relationship track record

I don’t know if it’s the bipolar, the bisexuality, or the Libra, but I haven’t been the best at holding down a relationship.

To be fair, the bar is high for me. My dad still makes my mum belly laugh like it’s the first six months of their relationship. They’re in their 60s and still hold hands down the street. That will warp a girl's expectations. And yes, I’m also the cliché ’90s kid who wants nothing less than a rom‑com romance. Deep down, I'm convinced that's what lies ahead of me.

I can practically hear you roll your eyes.

Single and 30 (something)

Sure, being single in your 30s could be a sign of many things: pickiness, prioritising work, fear, timing, trauma… and in my case, mental illness. And wow, do I know how to beat myself up? Telling myself that bipolar is the reason I still haven’t met my person. To be honest, it is a factor for me.

Pair bipolar with BPD and past trauma, it makes sense that relationships is one of the areas I struggle with most.

However, I’m also reminded that there have been plenty of suitors who could have been my person. People who were ready to settle down and “go the whole hog”. I just didn’t want to. Getting diagnosed later in life means this is yet another area where I feel like I’m playing catch‑up.

What about you guys? I’d love to hear your love stories, failures, and words of wisdom – please!

Love at first sight... or something else?

A friend recently asked me if I believe in love at first sight. I chuckled (and wonder if you would too), because when you live with bipolar, trusting your first instinct about anything is a challenge. My initial feelings usually come with a neon warning sign.

Then there’s limerence. Who’s heard of this? I only discovered the term last year, and honestly? Gamechanger.

limerence

noun

A state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically characterised by a strong desire for reciprocation of one’s feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Neurodivergent people are particularly susceptible. Knowing there’s a word for this emotional nonsense has been a blessing.

Trying something new

In a Valentine’s Day article I wrote for Happiful back in 2020, I said the following, which still applies now:

“One of my biggest triggers is relationships: dating, seven minutes in heaven, spin the bottle, and whatever else has occurred between the age of 15 and now.”

Over the last few months, I’ve pushed myself to try new approaches, because what I was doing before wasn’t working. As I touched on in last month’s column, I’ve been more direct in this area of my life – less crowdsourcing, more self‑trust and putting myself first.

A friend and I were joking that the Universe is running out of ideas for me. A short relationship came to an (amicable) end in September, and I could practically sense the Universe shaking its head, muttering, “Good Lord, April. Again? Back to the start.”

Then, five days later, it dropped a person into my life out of nowhere, in the middle of nowhere. For the first time in God knows how long, I had no control over the situation. It was (and is) unlike anything I’ve ever experienced, and little do they know how much it’s rewiring my mind.

Here I go, as always, opening my heart - and my mouth - far wider than originally intended.

Openness, identity, and letting the Universe lead

Now I’m here though… the older I get, the more I’m open to the Universe telling me whether I’m going to end up with a man or a woman. Honestly, it would be one less thing for my brain to wrestle with.

Oh, oh, and remember: even the most stable humans wobble when it comes to matters of the heart. If you’re wobbling too, you’re in excellent company.

So, yes, going back a few paragraphs, I do believe in love at first sight… I just usually don’t realise it was love at first sight until much later.

From hopeless to hopeful

Before we finish, can we talk about the term hopeless romantic? I don’t love the word hopeless. How did we settle on that when hopeful is right there? Shorter, kinder, and far more accurate.

So, I’m officially rebranding myself a hopeful romantic, and I urge you to join me. Together, let’s believe in happily‑ever‑afters, or at least happily‑for‑nows.

Lots of love, treasures,

April x